The 2 bounce-back Pills

How do we “keep” ourselves up when we are faced with challenges

Not too long ago, I saw this client who told me that he wants to be positive, but there are times he simply can’t help feeling negative, demotivated, lethargic.    

“I am not even myself anymore, I am feeling anxious, fearful..”

So he began to tell me his story

I have been working so hard for my GP training, failed the RCA (Royal College of GP) by one mark, I am still in shock.  

For the last 2 years, I got married, became a father, had covid, my grandma passed away, burnout

My motivation level is no longer the same, felt disappointment with myself, felt stuck… 

Somehow overcoming obstacles has become harder, maybe it’s the baby, the change in routine, the challenges of getting another case done, overall its such a strange feeling.

Sound familiar,

How can you pick yourself up in the midst of these storms, one after another, it seem like there is no end. As if the stormy weather, will simply not pass over, 雨过天晴 (sunshine after the storm) sounds like a joke when there is no light beyond this dark, dark tunnel.

Just like this medical doctor who was simply at his wits’ end, especially he knows time can help, heal. All he needs to find back that motivation in his life again. But how ?

No – I don’t have that magic pill or want to make everything right instantly. All I did is listen, and still listen deeply and whole heartily, and hold the space for him to outpour, reflect upon his words. And he found his 1st insights – his WHY in pursuing this profession.

When life get difficult, as we all know life is not a bed of roses, how can you pick up yourself up and move forward.   

• BE clear on your values (this is your inner compass of your life)

• your WHY, 

• And stay focus on your “goal”.   

(remember your goal has to be aligned to your values) 

His 2nd insight – gratitude.   

Most of us probably know the importance of gratitude but how many of us truly practice it diligently Or rather know the significance of Gratitude.

Gratitude, is the expression of appreciation for what one has. It is a recognition of value independent of monetary worth. 

In order to be grateful, there must be something good in our life for us to be thankful, to show appreciation for. Henceforth, gratitude is spontaneously generated from within, it is an affirmation of goodness and warmth. 

But do you also know that gratitude can be cultivated deliberately. Studies show that making conscious efforts to count one’s blessings. It is possible to feel grateful for loved ones, colleagues, animals, nature, and life in general. With brain scans, it has shown that gratitude has a lasting impact on the prefrontal cortex that heighten sensitivity to future experiences of gratitude.

In fact, psychologists have also find that, over time, feeling grateful boosts happiness and fosters both physical and psychological health, even among those already struggling with mental health problems. 

When we practice gratitude , it curbs the use of words expressing negative emotions and shifts inner attention away from those negative emotions such as resentment and envy, minimizing the possibility of ruminating, which is a hallmark of depression.

People who are grateful feel less pain, less stress, suffer insomnia less, have stronger immune systems, experience healthier relationships, and do better academically and professionally. Overall it can boost both your mental and your physical health.  

Grateful people are indeed less likely to have mental health problems like depression. One study found that a gratitude intervention was successful in reducing negative affect and increasing mental resilience in a group of older adults. 

My invitation to you today is find your motivation as above and know if you are able to tag into your gratitude (if only you allow yourself to), a cup of tea, even the rain that waters the plants, trees, forest, the beautiful sound it gives out, the rainbow after the rain. And there are many more, when you open your heart to see, hear, and feel the things and the people around you to be grateful for and feel the warmth from within.